Brooklyn's Weblog

Reflective Essay

brooklynh — Thu, 28 May 2009 18:56:57 +0000

Looking back on my time in my English classes this year, I feel that I have taken great strides in my writing skills. In the beginning, I had problems with organization, clarity, and other writing abilities. After plenty of constructive criticism and encouragement, I have absolutely transformed my writing. After reviewing the goals that I had set for myself at the beginning of the semester, I feel that I have met every one. I have made improvements in every aspect. From my writing style to my organization, growth is evident. Possibly the strongest evidence that I have to prove my growth is the change in my writing scores. At the beginning of the semester, I remember getting a four on an analytical essay. At that moment, I felt highly discouraged. I jumped around that score for a while. But, after reading every red-inked comment on my essays, I finally made some improvements. At the end, my last analytical essays were both eights. In my eyes, that is something to be proud of. I had exceeded my expectations. Looking back in my writing portfolio, I can see where my problems were and how I began to lose my bad habits in writing. I believe that this course has drastically improved my chances to obtain my goals in journalism. My mind now allows itself to be more creative, I am now able to think outside the box. I know that I will keep the lessons that I have learned in this course and implement them to their fullest extent. I can only hope to get better from this point and in seeing what improvements I have already made, I’m sure I can.

“Singer Solution to World Poverty” Argumentation essay

brooklynh — Mon, 04 May 2009 00:36:17 +0000

There is a side of society that often goes unseen by the middle and upper classes—a side ridden with poverty and misfortune. In “The Singer Solution to World Poverty,” Singer calls on the prosperous to provide for the less fortunate. Although the belief that the wealthy should provide for the poor is a burden to the fortunate few, the positive aspects outweigh the negative: selfless acts can create a moral majority and a world dilemma can be saved by those who have the means.
The idea that social responsibility should be laid upon the wealthy is a rather controversial issue that has been long debated. But as argument drags on, world problems worsen. A comparative debate of the upper class’s responsibility to the rest of society is the debate about taxes. The 2008 election campaign of Barack Obama professed that tax cuts would be given to families earning less than $250,000 a year. The prosperous citizens of America felt that this was an unfair measure that manipulated successful hard workers. Supporters of this proclaimed that it is a civic duty to pay taxes but some simply have the means to better support the government. This political debate can be easily applied to Singer’s argument that those with the means should support the well-being of the world. The negative aspect is that not the wealthy would be paying out an unequal share. The difference between tax cuts and Singer’s suggestion is that helping organizations such as UNICEF is voluntary—the donators feel that their actions are necessary.
The prosperous have an unequal power in society that is not always utilized in the best manner. Should this power be rightfully implemented, serious world issues could be solved. Materialism plays a large role in Western culture and important world crises are often absent from consciousness. Singer argues that “whatever money you’re spending on luxuries, not necessities should be given away.” It becomes clear that Singer is channeling the notions of famous philanthropists JP Morgan, Rockefeller, and Andrew Carnegie. These three men, among others, excelled in their particular craft and were largely successful in monetary terms. They believed that they should share their great earnings. This idea came from the Social Gospel—the idea that the wealthy should use their money to assist the less fortunate. Singer’s wish that prosperous citizens should donate money to organizations such as UNICEF would certainly reap the most ultimate positive benefit: the salvation of the hungry and sick who live without the means to help themselves.
Through my personal experiences of community service, I have learned the positive effects of selfless works. The act of service without personal gain reaps substantial benefits to the people involved. Singer believes that the wealthy are not always as helpful as they could be considering their available means. If the ways of the wealthy were to change, a new moral majority can be formed. Rather than making selfish and outrageous expenditures, people can spend their money on saving lives. The American habit of excess is prominent and it seems that selflessness is almost unheard of. Acts of charity are almost always tax deductible and public—personal gain now comes hand in hand with philanthropy. Yet there is a small minority who are helping the world little by little. UNICEF, Habitat for Humanity, the Peace Corps—these are the organizations that work to improve conditions for those less fortunate. If these groups were to be further supported by the powerful and prosperous, a substantial growth of morality would be evident. This new morality has implications for a new reputation of successful Americans—a new moral majority.
In the debate of the social responsibility of the economically successful, most would agree that service should come before materialism. Where this debate ends, however, is how much responsibility should be laid upon one group. While the wealthy should not be solely targeted as the group responsible for the world’s well being, it remains that with cooperation important crises can be resolved and these acts will form a new sense of morality. Should the wealthy accept some of this responsibility, the efficacy of every country will develop and the world would be in a better position to become united.

In the original draft of my argumentation essay, I had a few organization and grammar problems. Overall, I feel that I am at a good start for this particular essay and I think that I can only improve from here. Personally, this is my favorite essay. I feel that this essay has the most freedom when it comes to the thought that goes into it. The changes that I made helped to improve the cohesiveness of my paper. I messed around with the topic sentences and clinchers and I changed the ideas in my third body paragraph. I actually enjoy writing this essay and I don’t think that I would mind practicing them more.

John M. Barry Analytical Essay Revision

brooklynh — Thu, 30 Apr 2009 01:58:02 +0000

During the 1918 flu epidemic, it became evident that challenging aspects of scientific research required certain traits within scientists. In a passage from The Great Influenza, John M. Barry implements exemplification, poignant diction, and didactic figurative language in order to depict the work of a scientist as challenging and complex and to characterize scientists as those who should possess the traits that are necessary in order to accomplish their goals.
In order to identify the presence of obstacles in the world of experimentation and to describe the characteristics necessary to overcome them, Barry utilizes exemplification by providing specific scenarios. While describing the creativity needed to defeat common impediments, Barry uses the examination of a rock as an example to support his claim. He discusses what tools would be the most appropriate to use—“Would a pick be best, or would dynamite be better?”This hypothetical situation is perfect for depicting Barry’s claim that creativity is a common obstacle that scientists encounter in their work. He goes on to use the examination of a rock’s environment as an example of a scientist’s quest of obtaining needed information—“There is a stream passing over the rock.” These examples assist the author in supporting his idea that experimentation provides problems that scientists must overcome through the use of creativity and curiosity. Adding on to this strategy is his clear, concise, and powerful diction.
Barry’s use of sophisticated and descriptive diction allows the audience to further understand his overall purpose of communicating the challenges of experimentation and the attributes that grow from the experience. In describing the decisions that scientists must make, Barry describes work as “grunt” and “tedious.” The reader realizes through this diction that a scientist does experience a complicated workload. He utilizes poignant words such as “strength” and “courage” in order to portray the characteristics that are needed to overcome the inevitable uncertainty that is so common in science. While describing a scientist’s journey into the “unknown,” Barry uses words such as “wilderness” and “frontier” which further illustrate the aforementioned uncertainties. In culminating these examples of powerful diction, one can see that Barry is successful in conveying the depths of research.
By using several devices of figurative language, Barry is able to further describe a researcher’s challenges by comparing them to other situations and ideas. While discussing the unknown frontier that scientists must endure, Barry describes a “wilderness region” that is unfamiliar and new. He continues to say that scientists venture “through the looking glass” into a new frontier. These devices help to create familiar ideas that will help the audience understand an unfamiliar situation. Another clever mechanism used was simile that compared research to a “crystal” by explaining that “probing” was to “precipitate an order out of chaos,” much like a crystalline structure that forms an ordered structure that is seemingly complex. Finally, Barry implements metaphor in order to discuss what follows a discovery. He describes “a flood of colleagues” that “pave roads over the path laid.” This metaphor describes how science changes continuously, one discovery after another ultimately communicating the patience and curiosity that a scientist must have. The culmination of these didactic figurative devices teaches a new way of understanding for an audience that is unfamiliar with the author’s theme.
Barry successfully conveys the many trials that scientists will endure in their work and the qualities that are essential in order to be successful by using three effective rhetorical devices—exemplification, powerful diction, and insightful figurative language. His use experience during the flu epidemic with educated rhetoric combines to prove his claim that there is much more to science than what is seen on the surface.

In the revision of my analytical essay, I felt that there were some important aspects that I needed to consider changing. Even though my peer editor felt that my paper was a nine, I strongly disagreed. In looking back on my essay, I found serious errors and I did not feel that I had gone in depth enough. After looking over the chief reader comments I realized that there was an important component missing from my stated purpose—the characterization of a scientist. I added details in my essay that compensated for the missing pieces that likely would have been the fatal flaw of the paper. After editing the overall purpose and reorganizing the details of my essay, I feel that the value was greatly increased. Personally, I believe that I would have given my essay a 5 or 6 in the beginning. Hopefully, the improvements that I have made will change my score.

Memoir Synthesis Analysis

brooklynh — Tue, 21 Apr 2009 16:09:54 +0000

Looking back on my synthesis paper, there are many things that I need to work on. While my ideas and style may be proficient, time management is my ultimate fault. Personally, I believe that time shouldn’t measure my writing skills but this is something that I must deal with on the AP exam. In my paper I was rushing and did not sort my thoughts out. I actually ended up seeming extremely redundant as I repeated contentions throughout my essay. The major changes that I made were mostly in the realm of organization. I combined the details from my refutation and put them in the similar body paragraph. Consequentially, I had to make a brand new refutation. I also wrote a conclusion which was not present in the original draft. Along with these revisions, I fixed the minor grammatical errors that were marked. Overall, I believe that my changes definitely increased the quality of my essay and I hope to do as well on the essay that we are writing tomorrow.

Memoir Synthesis

brooklynh — Tue, 21 Apr 2009 15:23:15 +0000

As curiosity-driven readers flip through the pages of the latest acclaimed memoir, questions of credibility are often raised in their minds. Are all of these life-changing stories true, or are they simply decorations being put on a slightly less exciting life? A polemic has been created over the actual definition of a memoir—educated readers are being misled by fabricated “truths.” While it may be argued that sensationalized versions of the truth are detrimental to the credibility of a memoir, it is clear that in order for the narrative to serve its true function—to convey a life-lesson—two things must be included: minor embellishments of the truth and an insightful analysis of the authors own memories.
The belief that anyone is able to recall every minute detail and dialogue of a certain time period is illogical. Not every memoir can be a thorough account of the truth. Due to this human incapability, some embellishments are necessary in order to connect to the readers. These decorations are much like Christmas tree lights. Without bright ornamental colors, the tree would be like any other. The author’s job is to captivate the reader while still adhering to the truth. In order to fulfill this duty, some adornments have to be included. Rather than recounting every mundane event, Tobias Wolff, an acclaimed memoirist, conveys the opinion that our mind must be the writer—“Memory has its own story to tell” (Source E). Writers must trust their own memory to assist in telling the right story that creates the theme of the memoir.
While writing a memoir, there is much more to consider than the stories that are being told. The writer must make connections that culminate to serve a greater truth. An analysis of the experiences is crucial. A belief that has risen in defense of fabrications in memoirs is that “truth is merely a matter of personal perception” (Source C). But isn’t perception the goal of a memoir? These stories are meant to depict a certain perspective that the writers envisioned during times of their lives. As a writer looks back, perception of a particular moment may be mixed or changed. Whether it is a hallucinating drug addict or a daydreamer, the stories are often sparked by an imaginative memory. The author must “transform experience into meaning” (Source F). This will compel readers to think past the plot and develop the purpose of the memoir. Without a little imaginative license, memoirs would be an uninspiring log of events. Altered reminiscent perspectives make the memoir, not itineraries.
Recently, several controversies developed after memoir writers were exposed. Critics often argue that the genre of nonfiction is being stretched to accommodate sensationalized liars. While it may be true that certain fabrications have been published as actual events, it does not follow that the commitment to truth has been invalidated. There is still a solid ground of reality that memoirs are based on. As previously stated, certain adornments are needed in order to captivate readers. Due to the hype that memoirists are now given, readers are less trusting of the credibility of nonfiction. For these reasons, readers must overlook this loss of faith and realize what the author is trying to convey through their personal experiences. Rather than pointing out little lies, readers should be looking for the evident truth.
When it comes to the debate of a memoir’s overall commitment to truth, most will agree that authors have fabricated parts of their nonfiction works. Where this agreement usually ends, however, is on the question of whether the commitment of truth is still valid in memoirs. Whereas some are convinced that they can never trust a memoir, others maintain that the work is always built upon a foundation of real events. After closely examining both sides, it becomes clear that minor embellishments and stories of altered perspectives are created to serve the goal of the memoir—to communicate a lesson. An understanding of the memoir has implications for an understanding of the prominence of shared experiences and their effect on faithful readers.

Dissatisfaction Guaranteed

brooklynh — Tue, 07 Apr 2009 11:37:07 +0000

Although contradictory, man’s quest to conform is actually linked with self-approval. Twain explains that in order to approve of you, social acceptance is necessary. The sole way of being socially accepted is to conform; the connection is rather logical. A certain sense of confidence is attached with popularity–the ultimate goal of the modern socialite. Examples can be found in almost every aspect of Western culture. From our style to our favorite song, we are compelled to secure a spot on the social ladder through an exterior that conforms. By achieving this goal, a social climber can feel content with themselves because they know that others are content with them. The opinions of whether this achievement is truly noteworthy changes with each perspective. How can a person drop their most manifest beliefs in order to be respected? A decline of morality can be detected as individuality is traded for reputation. Society has become a place where in order to be happy you must stay inside the lines–if you wander, dissatisfaction is guaranteed. (Question 1 Discussion)

The parallelism employed in paragraph 14 shows what man does and how it is wrong. He describes how they read, argue, and have opinions, but he concludes that these actions are one-sided and unoriginal. While addressing the other side of his opinion, Twain quickly and effectively refutes it. (Question 8 Rhetoric and Style)

Advertisement Analysis

brooklynh — Fri, 27 Mar 2009 14:01:51 +0000

Eye-catching colors and images—the features that entice female teens while subsequently sending an underlying message—come together to create a highly effective advertisement campaign. In an ad for the Candies Foundation in the October, 2008 issue of Teen Vogue, the utilization of bold image techniques, clever textual devices, and a celebrity endorsement attracts the target audience, teenage girls, and conveys the ultimate goal of the ad campaign—informing teenage girls of the consequences of sexual activity.

The use of bold colors, varied text sizes, and a bright white crib contrasts against a black background effectively enticing the teenage girl demographic. A hot pink color adds energy to the ad that builds curiosity. The same effect can be accredited to the single image of a crib. This picture captivates its audience and provokes questions, pulling readers further into the underlying theme. Adding to this effect is the all capital, bold text that readers cannot escape. The opposing smaller print responds to the details necessary to the clarity of the message. Now that the reader’s attention is caught, the content must do its job in holding onto it.

Textual devices in this advertisement are to the point in most aspects but part from the traditional methods of abstinence education. While all devices point toward abstinence ideals, the unpopular term, in the minds of most sexually active teens, is avoided. Regardless, the ideals are successfully conveyed through several textual means. Certain diction contains connotations such as the “devastating consequences” that stem from teen pregnancy. In addition, the presence of a monetary figure—“a baby can cost $10,000 a year”—is an effective attention-getter. The focus of the ad is framed through a rhetorical question encased in quotes. The intended effect is to provoke thought within the audience. This is achieved through a question that places the circumstances of teen pregnancy in an interesting perspective. A pun is utilized with the word “crib” which has transformed from a baby bed into a term for a home. The pun is used in relativity to the image of the crib below to better realize teen pregnancy. Another way that this question relates to teens is informal diction. The interjection “huh?” creates an informal tone easily connected to teenage vernacular. Finally, the implication that having sex once leads to spending $10,000 dollars indicates an implied slippery slope logical fallacy. This stresses the possible consequences of unsafe sex. In this advertisement, however, the message is only as good as the messenger.

Celebrity endorsements have become frequent ploys in advertising. Endorsements have an effect similar to the bandwagon fallacy. The appearance that a celebrity likes it tells teenagers—the minions of pop culture—that they should like it too. For this ad, Hayden Panettierre, an actress, is the voice of the foundation. She is considered a respectable and attractive teenage girl—an ideal role model. Since the message can apply to her, she is a sensible choice that gives credibility to the advertisement. This establishment of ethos further fortifies the campaign.

These elements discussed combine to create a successful advertisement. The eye-catching visual attractions, the textual features, and the influential celebrity appearance culminate into a direct appeal to teenage girls, warning them of the consequences of unsafe sexual activity. In this advertisement, powerful appeals publicize a cause that incites teens to be safe while gaining support for the foundation. The powers of advertising are perfectly illustrated in almost every arena—powers that captivate the American people wherever they go. (581 words)

The SAT: An Unnecessary Means

brooklynh — Mon, 16 Mar 2009 16:26:38 +0000

There is one number that remains with high school seniors well after graduation––the SAT score. I find it peculiar that one test score can determine a student’s scholastic fate. The SAT, developed in the 1920’s, was originally meant to measure “predictive validity,” –– a student’s probable success in college (Lewis). It has become my understanding through my research that the SAT has been transformed into a rat race for the best possible score. Focus has been shifted from learning educational content to learning test-taking tricks. Due to these findings, I have concluded that the SAT is no longer a driving force in equally predicting a student’s aptitude and therefore should no longer be depended upon to determine collegial admissions. The argument that I have provided has been discussed and even applied. Recently, Wake Forest––a top 30 national university––has dropped their requirement for the admission of SAT scores (Inside). The fact that a top ranked school has taken this action has proven that the SAT is not as necessary as it seems. If a top university no longer deems the SAT as relevant then why are students still stressing over their scores every year? This situation must be addressed in order to ensure a fair and less strenuous admissions experience. It seems that some are in agreement with me. Extensive studies have been administered in order to acknowledge an argument much similar to mine. The University of California’s research has pointed toward the fact that the SAT has become irrelevant. Statistical studies from the university have proven that the SAT score percentage value makes a trivial difference in the overall measurement of student’s aptitude when combined with class rank, GPA, and other factors (Murray). Another contention opposing the validity of the SAT is the concept of the coaching effect. Although coaching does not make a substantial difference in testing scores, the fact that a student can get ahead of another indicates a flaw in the system. Those that are available to the means of hiring a coach hold an advantage over others (Murray). This creates an imbalance within the playing field. A once fair standardized test has been jeopardized due to the disclosure of test-taking tricks. If the concept of the SAT has been dismantled, how much longer can universities stand behind it? Many would answer this question by stating that this is the best means of equally measuring students’ ability. If the SAT was in fact abolished, how would colleges fairly administer the application process? There is a logical argument that an A at one school could be a B at another. How would colleges be able to sift through the imbalance? The solution is SAT II Achievement tests. The SAT II is an additional test that evaluates ability in one subject. These subject-tests allow students to better apply their knowledge in isolated single subject matter such as Chemistry, Spanish, or US History. Charles Murray presented this solution in his article, “Abolish the SAT.” He claims that the low-income student unable to afford coaching that is “shut out of mysteries” of the SAT will now be fairly measured among all types of students. Now, all test takers will have to put in the time to study and truly show their abilities (Murray). Since there is a replacement for the SAT, people do not have much left to argue for its survival. In summation of my argument, the reliance on the SAT to accept students must be reconsidered in order to protect the futures of collegiate hopefuls. I urge a reevaluation of this test in the best interest of high school students. There is a better equalizer available to predict a student’s aptitude and this means must be applied. With action, there could be a better chosen population of college students that truly reflect intellectual achievement in the academic world.

My goals for AP Language and Composition

brooklynh — Fri, 23 Jan 2009 03:17:20 +0000

On my first day of AP English, I witnessed a preview of what I will be confronted with in this course. The diagnostics exam was challenging and I now see that I need to refine my test-taking skills. After taking this exam I noticed that I must not take so much time annotating the passage and focus more on the purpose of the text. This will help me when it comes to time management during the AP exam. In response my aspirations of taking this challenging course, I expect increase my proficiency in writing and refine my ability to dissect difficult texts, such as the one that we were exposed to today. In order to meet my goals I plan to write on my own more often and examine challenging literature. I am certain that this class will prepare me for my college courses and furthermore pave the way for a challenging career. Our discussions about rhetoric have further convinced me of my ultimate goal: journalism. As I work throughout the semester, I intend to receive constructive criticism that will only help to improve my writing. At the end of the semester I hope to have obtained a more refined style of writing and a more thoughtful way of interpreting texts. The classroom goals that are stated in the syllabus strongly coincide with my willingness to learn. On my last day of AP English, I hope to be able to take the same diagnostic test and be confident that I have achieved my central goal: improvement. (256)

Journal Entry Experimentations

brooklynh — Mon, 05 Jan 2009 12:14:13 +0000

The following journal entries have been written during my semester in Honors English Three. I will explain the texts or events that inspired my entries after each one.

Jounal Entry One: August 27, 2008

I suppose that I hold the more liberal perspective on immigration. I believe that we should embrace the immigration in our country. We should be a country with open arms and allow them to experience America. Of course, the issue is ridden with taxes and threats to our economy–but with a secure and organied program, this can be fixed. Those who come to America without permission from the government are illegal immigrants, not aliens! If this were the case, we’re all aliens, because no family line is truly American bred. The title, “Aliens”, is derogatory. With Americans holding this attitude, other countries look at us as snobbish and narrow-minded people. If we could end the everlasting stalemate on the issue, we could work together to find the solution.

This entry stemmed from a NPR discussion about derogatory terms toward immigrants. This was of course a controversial subject that created a great debate in the classroom. Personally, I am very interested in political situations and this stands as one of the greatest rifts in our country’s history.

Journal Entry Two: September 10, 2008

Every civilization has held the dream of becoming the “perfect city upon a hill”, the dream of becoming a utopia. In America, some believe that we are the best in the world. This may only be true in terms of materialism. Other countries have more inviting customs whereas we tend to appear as a rejecting nation. Of course, this is a generalized statement, but this is what is held in the eye of a foreigner. This perception has hurt us dearly in terms of diplomacy. Where theology and morality seems to be the candle for the 1600s Puritans, our candle is money or the materialism that was gained through the money. The candle is a greate metaphor becuse the one who holds it yeilds great honor in leading our world. I don’t believe that any one group or person could hold it.

I wrote this in response to the question of where the power and influence is held in the world. My answer is that power is dispersed, yet some hold more influence than others. The metaphor of the one that holds the candle to light our world is discussed in this entry. My opinon of America and other’s opinions as well are mentioned.

Journal Entry Three: October 2, 2008

When making decisions, I tend to rely on intuition and emotion. Of course, this seems like a childish decision but I feel that I know enough to make the right choice. But can this be a valid answer? I believe that logic affects my intuition. When I think about a decision, I immediately rule out ridiculous ideas and use my intuition to make the right choice I do seem to make rash decisions at times, but I lean towards the right path. If I were to choose between which one I favor more, it would be my intuition. Everybody has facts, but only I know what’s good for me.

This journal was in response to the following question: When making decisions do you rely on logic or emotion? I chose emotion but also questioned whether or not logic is involved as well. I concluded that both are necessary to make a decision, but emotion often overrides logic in my mentality.

Joural Entry Four: October 21, 2008

The pomegranate’s little seeds are not something of a common fruit. The flavr is stored in little catacombs and one must pick at the fruit to gain the prize. Be careful! This juice will attaack you and you will have to work hard to remove their mark. When you pry out the seed, you see small a small red and white type of grape: the fruit of your labor. As you crunch into it, the sensation is not long lasting. A tiny spurt of juice comes and goes. These little seeds pack the bitter. These chinese apples are something I enjoy, but it is an acquired taste.

This entry was in response to actually eating pomegranate seeds and describing the experience. This was an exploration imagery. This experiment helped me to explore my abilities in the field of imagery. Describing it with all of my senses helped to to become a better writer.

Journal Entry Five: December 10, 2008

Love

is screaming at the world,

“What happened?”

It finds faith in very few lovers

“Where did honesty go?

Out the door with chivalry

upon the creation of loveless lust?”

Love searches for its true believers

but doesn’t find many.

It wanders along waiting for the ones

that believe in its power,

and hold strong to the commitment

that love requires.

But Love asks

“Are there such people anymore?

Or has Temptation stolen my thunder?”

This journal entry was assigned to be a personification of an inanimate object or idea. I chose love. I personified this idea by capitalizing it, like a name. I also gave it dialogue, ideas, and actions. This experimentation of personification helped me later on in creating extended metaphors.